This is a cautionary tale which shows how good intentions can be subverted by net nannies.

The story begins with a Usenet newsgroup that was being overrun by trolls. A couple of people volunteered to set up a moderated version of the group and I was one of the people who promised to do a bit of moderating. For those of you unfamiliar with this, all it means is that posts to the newsgroup have to be approved by someone trusted before it appears in public. In this way the off-topic and obnoxiously provocative posters are denied an opportunity to make a nuisance of themselves; leaving the rest of us to discuss matters and ask questions without being abused, shouted at and interrupted by obnoxious people who’s only enjoyment in life seems to be being a pain in the arse for others.

Anyone can set up a newsgroup in the usenet hierarchy provided they say what the subject discussion should be focussed on and other ground rules.1 Typically a self-appointed group cobble together some fine words that attempts to be a watertight definition of what is and isn’t allowed. This is called a charter.

Lesson one was that even though the hoards were at the gates there was still room for an enormous amount of dispute over the exact form of words. The basics were understood but then somebody would point out a potential loophole or disagreed with a particular nuance of a particular word. Strewth! Why don’t you guys (and they were all men) just get on with it. I was paxed.2 Whatever happened to “the ends justify the means”.

There was now a hiatus as the rusty and decayed Usenet machinery creaked into action. This was beyond our control. The moderation software turned out to be buggy and not very well presented. I could fix some of those things so I found out how to do it and passed on my detailed suggested fixes to the bods in charge of the engine room. It turned out that the bod I passed this on to was using a text-based web browser – something that is completely inappropriate to modern use of the web by 99.9999% of the rest of us. So that didn’t get too far – A bit like taking your car to a blacksmith to get it serviced. On the other hand when we started running the system for real we were able to adapt various aspects quickly.The open source software paradigm is brilliant in that it allows fast fixes and multiple strands of development.

Lesson two was that although the Internet is pretty good at evolving, improving and adapting, sometimes this is at the price of bumbling amateurism.

At last we had a live working newsgroup and the fun really started. At the charter definition stage people had been suggesting all sorts of scenarios so they were well fired-up to pounce on malefactors. Once again there has been a huge amount of missing the point going on. The object is to keep out the mischief makers not to sanitize and suffocate debate. What amazes me is that some moderators are so sure of their right to reject posts on trivial grounds yet show the greatest nervousness when there might be the very slightest whiff of impropriety on their behalf. One post was rejected on the grounds of misuse of punctuation and I’ve researched this poster on Google and they are provocative! Really that’s true and was meant seriously.

Lesson three is that there are some people that shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near a censorship role as they have a passion for the job that exceeds their discriminatory abilities many times over.

Lesson four is that just because people appear to be ‘good eggs’ doesn’t mean they can be trusted to exercise judgement.

I wonder if there is some personality test that could be applied here to get the right combination of abilities to see the wood for the trees?

1. And they have to show some level of support.
2. See blog entry for 16 Oct 2009.

In Maldon the river is seriously silting up and nobody will accept responsibility for dredging it.

I’m the creep of Maldon quay. Your cash belongs to me.
One day when you are moored, I’ll sneak my way on board
When you’re glued in the ooze, I’ll collect my harbour dues
I’ll take your mooring fee, I’m the creep of Maldon quay

My welcome ‘s unfriendly; please stay away at sea.
If you’re deep in the sludge you’ll need a tow to budge.
There’s mud at Maldon quay, sprinkled with debris,
Of that I’ll guarantee. I’m the creep of Maldon quay

Oh I’m the Creep of Maldon quay. I’m a council employee.
When in the mud you’re stuck – Then I don’t care a lot.
When you can’t get afloat, Then I will sit and gloat.
I’ll count my cash with glee. I’m the creep of Maldon quay.

1. Tune: The sheik of araby

John Boyce of Mighty Oak brewery in Maldon tells me of a way he’s found to stop the spout on a tap dripping. For those of you unused to gravity beer you drive a tap into the cask then attach a pouring spout. After filling the glass with ale you turn off the tap and take it away… …but sometimes the spout isn’t properly empty and a glob of beer splashes into the drip trays. This wastes beer and makes a mess.

All you do is drill a 3mm hole at the apex of the curve in the spout. This is small enough not to spew beer out of but large enough to admit air after the tap has been turned off and break any air-lock effect.

The other day I was asked what my personal philosophy was.
Discriminating in that I’ll weigh people and things up and leave well alone or find out more.
Accommodating follows-on. Once you’re talking to someone who hasn’t been ruled-out then at least give them enough rope to hang themselves.

This combination works well in pubs where in my opinion there are people best left well alone, while the rest have all sorts of weird ideas and mis-conceptions. If you believe in organised religion then you won’t get a moment of accommodation from me.

Zonk A lizard.

Dustibro The unused parts of a house that collect junk and dust.

Paxst / Paxed Present and correct hours ago and keen to start. eg “Come on! We’ll be late! No you can’t clean the crumbs from the toaster! I’m Paxst.”

Another example of the utter incompetence that is Kent County Council highways department. Last time they couldn’t understand that water drained downhill now they have difficulty with where the sun is.
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Bad news A lot of free software is rubbish. Many paid-for programs are rubbish as well. Loads of it is pre-loaded by manufacturers 1 and starts of its own accord serving to clutter up your system, use resources, open up security holes and many worse things. The next post in this series will cover how to slim your system

Good news You can do just about everything for free. Paying for programs should be an absolute last resort. Read more

Your free daily drip-feed of thought provocation is now available.

New readers start here

A Cognolog is five small suggestive paragraphs drip-fed one per day. The purpose is to encourage imaginative and critical thinking and also to provide topics for conversation and exploration.
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A book of poems by Mr G a Evans was published including the blurb the new Betjeman. So a little bit of research about Mr Evans and then Tally Ho!

The gas was on in the Institute,
The light was on in the shack,
A man was running a terrible cold,
A lass was laid on her back,
When G A Evans the Chippenham man,
G A Evans from Chippenham,
Came writing about the olden time
When chips were made of germanium
Writing about -
Writing about -
Writing about the Mullard
Transistor OC Seventy-One while showing he’s no dullard.

The sun shone low on the railway line
Aroundabouts Bath and Colne
And sat at the upstairs window
Was ‘GA’ all alone
When he saw the ghost of Betjeman,
Sir John with his pen full of ink
Come tripping along in a pin stripe suit
For a Saturday evening drink.
Sipping a drink -
Sipping a drink -
At the bar of the old Bull and Bush
Sipping some more he fell off his stool and faded away in a rush.

There wasn’t a man in Winterbourne
That didn’t think it a fake,
And over the valley in Trowbridge,
And round by Savernake,
When G A Evans the Chippenham man,
G A Evans from Chippenham,
Made him his heir and brought him drinks
And how quickly he’d been sipping ‘em.
Made him his heir
Made him his heir
To write technical information
Paying a call at WH Smith to pick up his publication.

1. The original is called A Shropshire Lad

Something that gets forgotten all too often is that the practical effects of a health problem can be magnified by losing ones confidence.

Yesterday Dame Maggie Smith was quoted as saying It leaves you so flattened. I’m not sure I could go back to theatre work, although film work is more tiring. I’m frightened to work in theatre now. I feel very uncertain. I haven’t done it for a while.

My mum, 82, broke her wrist 10 days ago and has coped very well with it… but although she’s of that generation who grew up with bombs falling on them and getting on with things, the ‘give-up-its-impossible’ demon is getting a say.

These made me think that although when these sorts of things happen we know there’s likely to be various amounts of frustration, anger, disappointment and other emotional fall-out we may not be so clued-up to basic confidence.1 For example somebody might postpone a holiday whilst awaiting ‘results of tests’. The possibility of actual trouble is being turned into actual trouble.

The challenge is to work out how to be a confidence coach. It’s one of those things like giving advice. I expect there are techniques2 but this is all new to me.

1. There may be a name for this. If not I’ll call it The Fox effect and be done with it.
2. Be warned! The obvious ones may be temporary and have a backlash.